Wednesday, 25 January 2017

Pretending To Be An Adult Being: Moving Out

Dublin, Ireland

Dress - H&M ( On Sale Right Now! )
Fishnet Tights - Claire's
Boots - Primark, Similar here and here
Bag - Primark

In my 2016 review I mentioned that the biggest change to take effect in this new year would be the fact that I moved out of  the family home. With my family moving to England, I stayed behind to attend third level education here in Ireland. For a few months prior to the house share I am in now I lived under the roof and support of dear friends but then, I dropped out of my college course ( the whys of which will come in another post) and made the decision to work for the year before reapplying to another course and now I'm renting out a room in a house.

When you're a teenager and you have fights with your parents or siblings, if you're like me you'd have comforted yourself with thoughts of moving out to your own place and being able to do what you want when you wanted. That freedom was never something I had an issue accessing and from a very young age have been quite independent. No I was not some neglected child, so don't get any sad story ideas. I just assumed a lot of responsibilities at a younger age than others which have not screwed me up as much as they've helped me. Therefore I needed a space within which I could exercise that freedom and independence when my family moved away and I stayed behind for college.

Once the decision was made the execution of it was pretty simple. For a few weeks I lived on keeping an eye on everything available. I wanted to find somewhere relatively close to where I'd been living the past 9 years so I wouldn't be too far away from my little sister, the family we'd accumulated,my  friends, my boyfriend and all the little familiarities I'd grown so accustomed to in the area.

Then it was email after email in reply to ads in hopes for viewings and there were a few. I saw some good houses that ticked all the boxes except the most important one, price. Some were a little on the creepy side like the lady that lived in her sitting room despite having a three bedroom house. You have to go with your instincts when dealing with strangers and maybe there's nothing wrong with her living situation and my perceptions were influenced by my hunger ( doubtful ) but I was creeped out. She did have a cute dig though.

All through this my main goal was to find a place I could be happy and maintain rent when I go back to college. I am in my fourth week at the new house now. Some days it feels longer and other days it feels as though the time has flown by. I spend my days either working, writing, meeting friends, sleeping in and keeping busy with little side projects like organising all my pictures and getting them printed.

It is just myself and the landlady so far so when she's not around it almost feels as though I have my own place. However I do prefer it when she's around as I like the companionship. There's no obligation for us to talk or make long winded conversation. I enjoy our little chats and the golden silent times also.

The one major downside of this month is how out of routine things have become. I don't like strict daily routines but I'm not a fan of the way my self-discipline about doing things has been waning lately. As a goal to be more organised this year, I've been making my to-do lists almost nightly and failing to stick to them.

I've found that my exercise and overall physical health has taken two steps back since I started cycling everywhere. I am saving money not using public transport but I am also spending a lot on food when I meet up with friends. I am great at doing a food shop but my eyes are bigger than my stomach and I'm not getting through everything I am buying before it goes to waste.

I'm not a perfect independent person and I never said I was. I'm learning to use a lot of little knowledge gems that I hadn't paid much attention to before like how you can freeze just about anything to make it last. And there's also a lot more to learn. Yes I am good at budgeting, but I could be better. I can be a little stricter when it comes to pushing myself to exercise, not so much for the physical benefits but the mental health aspects.

I take good care of myself, I know that but if anything this month is highlighting the little cracks I slip into. I have no routine to my life any more, no college to take up the majority of my days and work schedule aren't static, my weeks are never the same and I love that but I don't know if that is hurting or helping me. 

I'm 19 and pretending to be an adult being, if you happen to know where I can find the handbook of adulthood give me a shout. Until then I'll write my own and see where it goes. This is only the beginning and I hope you'll come on this journey with me.

What was your first experience of moving out of home like? I'm not asking for the comments, I do genuinely want to know.

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Till next time my pretties xxx

10 comments so far

  1. I haven't properly had to pretend to be an adult yet. I did move out of my parents' house to go to university, but I lived on campus to avoid a lot of stresses, so I didn't fully have to experience the stresses of budgeting, everything was paid in advance, you know? But I think that by trying in the first place that you are steps ahead of you think you are. We all have to get used to the idea that no one knows how to be an adult, unfortunately! We all just make it up as we go along.

    Erin | Explore, Refresh

    1. I think living on campus itself has it's own stresses that I will probably not ever know. Like trying to stay true true yourself amongst so many different people, that can't be easy either so in ways you've learned things I may never learn ;) But I'm glad we're all winging it together.

  2. You look amazing gorgeous.
    It's hard moving out but it's an amazing feeling.
    I hope everything works out for you ♥

  3. Love your outfit it's really cool! I completely understand you with moving out. I'm 19 as well and I'm moving out this summer when I go to Uni in Amsterdam. I hope it will al workout well for you and good luck with your courses! :)

    1. Thanks Isabel and best of luck with Uni, I'm sure you'll love it and learn so many new things about yourself and life. I'm also pretty jealous you get to be in Amsterdam all the time hahah

      Ama xxx

  4. I really love your dress! You look gorgeous!!�� Moving out is not easy. I don't know what it's like though. But I find your courage and willingness to keep going inspiring :)
    I hope things work out friend ❤️. You'll get there. Nobody knows how adulthood works �� just gotta figure it out along the way. Seems to me you're doing an amazing job though.
    Don't hesitate to reach out to anyone near you.
    Love anon ;) xxx

    1. Ah Anon, why you do this to me? Now I just really want to know who you are haha. Thank you so much for your kind words! I take them on board more than you'll probably ever know. I'm looking to the future with positive eyes knowing I have a wealth of support around me in the people that know and care for me. So far I'm enjoying figuring this all out..for now lol

      Ama xxx

  5. Hey dear, this is Rin from Facebook.

    I left my home at a young age too to pursue a fashion degree. I got a scholarship and there was no way I was going to pass it up, though my parents were really against me living by myself. We lived in the boonies and there was no way i can soldier it up and just travel back and forth even though Japan does have a great transport system. This is over a decade ago as I am now in my 30's but I still remember the struggle of living alone!

    During my first year of moving out my health took a deep plunge because I did not know how to cook. Though I am skilled in designing and making clothes I kind of have forgotten to stock knowledge on the rest of the domestic arts. My small apartment was a complete mess and I was not having enough spare money because I keep on eating out. I passed out one day in class after midterms from fatigue, malnourishment and over all stress (my then boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me too haha!).

    That's when i decided to take charge of myself.

    I hated routine but I found peace sticking to it.

    I will devote one day to cooking food for the week in batch which I will partly freeze and just pop in the microwave when it's meal time. I still do this now for breakfast and lunch.

    On my second year in college I started to do basic yoga and jog. I had to do this at least three times a week, no excuses. Exercise helped with my loneliness too. When I feel listless, I jog too. The endorphins released when you exercise really helps.

    I did not plan my day completely but those are things I will never skip.

    I think one thing you should know that most adults are not good at adulting either! Don't worry about it too much :) If you need someone to talk to, just ping me on facebook!

    1. Hi Rin!! Thank you so much for sharing your story with me. It's really resonated with me and I'm delighted you found a way to improve your situation. I've actually decided to do the same things you did for my February challenge so I am so glad to know they worked for you, I can't wait to see if it works for me too. Honestly thank you so much <3 <3 <3

      Ama xxx


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